Saturday, January 16, 2010

Back in my Element

An omission can be as powerful as an act. (Ask me how)

I was back in my element kanina, it was a wonderful experience to be able to recall what once was, what could have been and what could never be again, EXCUSE ME, what CAN STILL BE (I refer to the Creed btw).

After a bit of overexposure to 'the other place' it seems that other than the dominant colour things are pretty much the same. At least on the surface.

Sniffing the azure tinged air did give my one epiphany.

If I didn't make that faithful choice I would not have grown. Besides I met some very special people along the way. Very special people in deed... and I'm not talking about CT hehe..

It's time to pierce the veil, time for Charles to come out from hiding behind Francis and be a whole person again. A whole person forged in the fires of Katips and steeped in the codes. A survivor nourished by hardihood and woe.

I might as well be dead to the world if I can't be what I really am.

The kayefabe hinders me so greatly that I'm begining to feel like a cheap homoculus.

Say goodbye to who you thought I was. Say hello to the real me. Atenista ko eh, the more I try to hide / suppress it the more frustration wells up inside me. The more I impose a level of mediocrity upon me the deeper my thirst for Magis becomes. The more I try to adapt the more I realize how far I've gone from the truth.

... and if you hate me for it. At least you hate the real me and I'll relish every ounce of it.

Love remains the same.

Search for it sa Youtube check out Carmina Topacio's cover.

I never thought that I had anymore to give.... here I am without you.

Its been years... but you know what My love for you remains the same as it was in our COCC days (As it should have remained). You remain, Mother, Sister and Daughter to me.

Semper Fidelis 'mate! I'll be rooting for you in 2010

Dear Edlyn,

Dear Lyn,

I know why you were laughing and only heaven knows the depth of my contempt for the reason... Come on people!!! its been three years I've moved on. Why can't you? Iba na ka love-team nya :((

Did you know this was the reason why I did not come back?

I've made my peace with it.

Love you Eds hope you pass the bar I would dread the idea of taking the bar with you in 2011.